Introducing: Diary of a Future Leader

Over my 12-year career, leaders have consistently told me I’d make a great one. For years, I’d wrinkle my nose and dismiss it as delusion. But eventually, I started to understand what they were seeing.

My life is full of moments where I’ve led or displayed the traits of a leader; I'm trusted, dependable, and steady under pressure. And yet in the workforce, especially early on, all I wanted was to fade into the background, learn, and do my part. I avoided leadership opportunities and then found myself pushed into them anyway. I’d reflect on how they felt, on the feedback I’d get, and on the impact I quietly made. Over time, the idea of leadership stopped feeling foreign. It started feeling like the occasion I wanted to rise to.

I began telling everyone I wanted to be a Chief Information Security Officer, the security seat in the C-suite. But underneath that ambition was a nagging belief that I hadn’t done "enough" to be worthy of leading anyone.

What held me back was the belief I hadn’t done enough to be a leader worth her salt.

Though I enjoy many aspects of being an individual contributor, I can't help but feel like I’m hitting a wall. I’ve got insights that go unheard or get repackaged by others without credit. I’ve watched leaders choose leadership simply because it was the next rung on the corporate ladder, not because they had the passion, capacity, or skill for it. I’ve seen how often leadership is misunderstood, misused, or mishandled.

And still...I’m told I’d be good at it.
Still, I feel that pull.

But I'm not delusional, I know I don't know everything. Yes, I’ve led projects, training, and even parts of my family. But leadership inside a corporate system is different. There’s pressure, expectation, responsibility, and a system that often rewards everything except true leadership.

So enters this series: Diary of a Future Leader.

A series where I explore leadership from two angles: the vantage point of someone who’s been adjacent to it for years, and the perspective of someone stepping intentionally toward it. I’ll dive into archetypes of leaders I’ve encountered, the training I’m pursuing to get ready, the lessons from running my side business, and the realities (the good, the bad, and the oh so ugly) of leadership in modern workplaces.

Above all, this is where I tell the truth about leadership, and start unpacking the systems that uphold toxic or ineffective versions of it.

I might be biting off more than I can chew.
But I’m ready for the ride.

If you have any resources (books, podcasts, videos, courses, articles) drop them in the comments. Help a hopeful future leader out!

From the desk of a future leader,

Steph